Behold, the Midnight Crapper!

Well. It’s been a busy few weeks, and I have pulled a whole lot of lazy hours trying to recover. Which means staying in, which means getting to see Zoe at her prowliest.

First, there was the wee mousie in the ManCave. Then the one in my bedroom. Those were popped outside using the tried-and-true Arkansas Towel Scoop, perfected when I was down at Buffalo River NHP. (There’s one more mousie that seems to be under the fridge. But he has thus far eluded capture.)

Then…THE MF-ING MIDNIGHT CRAPPER Y’ALL! I was downstairs re-watching Godzilla, as you do, when I heard what I thought was Captain Howdy in a Regan suit. I rushed upstairs, because I would be the first person to die in a horror movie. But it wasn’t Pazuzu, it was my cat, poofed to 11. And emitting sounds straight out of the Amityville Horror playbook.

There was the Midnight Crapper, right on the deck! With only a thin veil of screen door between the Crapper and the cat about to crap herself. Being the kind, loving cat human, I raced back downstairs to grab my camera. Y’know, after I told Zoe she was a brave girl.

Crapper jumped down from the deck and made for the gate. But after I Crapper-proofed the fence, she (he? Dunno) was stuck. I went outside and hopped down, letting her get back to the deck. She immediately gave me the patented kitty death ray stare.


Impressive. Yes.

After she realized I wasn’t gunning for her, she hopped up on the “stair”.


Yep. I was pruning today. And yep, I have yet to rake it up.

Before I knew it, she was on the deck railing. She then gave me a “see, you’re making me jump over to the icky yard, and that’s a drop!” look. Then, like some sort of deranged bungee jumper, lept.

Sadly, these craptastic pics from my celly don’t do her justice. She’s larger than Zoe, but longer not fatter. (Sorry, Z.) She’s also longer of hair, that not longhaired, not shorthaired middle ground.

Can’t blame her for hopping the fence to get to my yard. It’s probably the safest spot around.

Meanwhile, Zoe, with the mice and the Crapper, has had a rough few days. I think it’s treat time for a kitten.


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